Thursday, August 17, 2006

Hollywood's Super Woman

by Donna L. Watkins

Are you a doer? This one's for you! If not, share with them the great attributes of your own personality and help them to slow down before their health forces them to.

It's so easy to get caught up in all the things the world wants us to do. We get surrounded by people who have many needs and desires and not enough time. Much of the world lives harried and stressful lives trying to be all things to all people. It's not possible! God never created a Super Woman, Hollywood did.

When do you take time for you? Do you feel you deserve personal time? Do you take time for fun? It's okay to do something just for fun. Go take a walk in the woods. Find a lake and spend some time watching the ripples from a boat, or a frog jumping off the bank, or from skipping rocks across the water. Maybe you just picture yourself passed out on the beach with thoughts of changing your name and disappearing into another lifestyle. You can have another lifestyle within the context of your current life and family .... it's truly your choice!

It seems those with the most health problems are the overly-responsible folks. To over-simplify, there are two types of people walking around this world. Those who are doers and those who are be-ers. The doers never get to the end of their project lists and never get to the end of focusing on that fact. It's all about getting things done ... and usually we feel like it's a have-to because "nobody else is going to do it."

Just because nobody else is going to do it doesn't make it our job to do it. Taking on more than one person can handle is not a wise thing. Jesus had a great call on His life and a great mission to fulfill in very few years on earth, but I have not read where He ever hurried.

I've read that there is always enough time to get everything done that God wants you to do. So ... if we're not getting it all done, maybe we need to re-evaluate what we're supposed to be doing. I have found in myself a sense of self-sufficiency that comes with doing it all, even though I resent the fact that I'm doing things that I know in my heart I shouldn't be doing.

The other type of person is one who can focus on the now and not seem to care about anything else that needs to be done. They can seemingly wait forever for something to be completed. They are laid-back, more patient, and seemingly oblivious to all that's required to maintain a home or to complete a project or run a business. There is no sense of urgency at all in them.

Isn't it odd that, generally, each of these are attracted to the other and end up getting married. Then not long after the honeymoon is over, the responsible person begins to feel like she / he's got double the workload. What needs to happen is a blending of these personalities. The doers could do with a bit less sense of urgency and the be-ers could do with a bit more concern for the overall picture. Be-ers are usually very helpful. They are pretty willing to do whatever to help as long as they are not being attacked and ridiculed for what they are not doing.

The problem is that doers don't really want help with the tasks that we inwardly know should not be ours, we want somebody to take them off of our shoulders and bear the burden that we were never meant to carry.

Having been a doer, and having lived with a be-er, has taught me a lot of things, but at a very slow pace, and not without a load of health issues. Women were never designed to take on the load of cares that our world now discharges onto them. Where is the gentleness, nurturing, mothering, supportive role that we were designed to fulfill? It's been left behind because we believe that it's all up to us.

Let me scream loudly, IT"S NOT! But as long as you stay on the treadmill and believe it's all about doing, you will spin and spin until you drop. My prayer is that you will change your beliefs and have a real heart-to-heart with your spouse or those around you that are be-ers to find a blended environment before you lose your health. Make a list of the toughest tasks and work together to come up with solutions. It's time to quit being Super Woman.

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