Sunday, July 5, 2009

The Evil of Judging Yourself

by Donna L. Watkins

The other morning I was waiting for a friend to drop something off, so I decided to do some journaling on the front porch awaiting her arrival. I brewed my herbal tea and made my protein smoothie and did my exercise rebounding and took my encapsulated herbs for my program spaced twenty minutes apart and ..... In other words I was busy with my morning routine. Then as I was about to go journal after making myself presentable enough for company, I noticed the litter box and decided to do that.

As I was cleaning it out, the voice in my head said, "You'll do anything to avoid meeting with God." Where did that come from? The devil? Some stored away anger I have with the Lord? Or was it just judging myself for being busy? I've worked hard at slowing down with a focus on BEING, so the Enemy is not too happy about not being able to keep me in a tizzy all day long.

I'm very analytical at times and can judge much too quickly when I don't understand something. As I scrolled through my mental list of options, I heard the soft voice of Papa saying, "You're quick to judge ... even yourself."

Yes, I am a morning person and most of my energy is ready to go in the early hours so I try to get the important things begun early, but I love meeting with my heavenly Father and listening to what He has to say to me in the early hours. The garden is such a holy place early in the morning. For so many years, my quiet times were all about my thoughts and questions to Him. I would ask questions but not sit still long enough without distracting thoughts to hear His answers. Now I realize He has much to say to me if I will, like Mary, sit at His feet no matter how many tasks are on my list.

Ya know, I'd never thought about judging myself. Oh yes, my brain has tried to control my thoughts and actions my entire life, when God wants us to live life with our heart ruling us. God gives us the desires of our heart ... not our minds. And the desires of our hearts are those that He has placed there. Another life lesson in the litter box.

We can control our thoughts (brain). It's been scientifically proven (see the referenced article below), but God has told us we can do this when He says, "Take every thought captive" (2 Cor. 10:5). But I never considered those thoughts against myself as judging. Now it's easy to see that they are. And what is the result of our judging? Luke 6:37 says, "Judge not, and ye shall not be judged: condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned: forgive, and ye shall be forgiven." So I processed through rebuking that thought and shut the process down and asked God to forgive me for judging myself. The last part was a new twist for me.

How often do we chide and rebuke ourselves unjustifiably? We are condemning one of God's children as much as if we are judging a brother or sister in Christ. God loves us incredibly well and we would live life in more peace and joy if we joined Him.

Related Article: Taking Thoughts Captive

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